The Empty Nest – What’s Next?

If your grown kids are leaving home, going off to college, getting married or starting a new job, there is good news. Many couples at this stage are spending more quality time together. Marital satisfaction increases as the quality of your interactions and conversations improve with each other.

The empty nest phase of your life is a time for renewed focus on your marital relationship. It is a time when taking care of your health becomes vital to being able to shift attention to new dreams or dreams you may have been putting off for years. It is a time to look forward to enjoying each other, close friends and your grandchildren.

At this time of life, it is not uncommon for you and your spouse to have a yearning to reconnect with each other. All the hard work you have been putting into your marriage over the years has given you an opportunity to enjoy creating the next phase of your lives together on your terms! Living lives that are creative, self-expressed and purposeful and sharing together on that journey can be exciting for both of you.

There are challenges. You also may find yourselves in the midst of other life transitions, such as the completion of your career, the death of your parents or the birth of grandchildren. You also might be making make major shifts in your roles at home.

This is a time to explore what you really care about. Rediscover simple pleasures like working in the garden, traveling and getting together with friends. Take on projects that require your joint attention and a team effort. Here are some questions for you to explore with each other:

• What’s coming to a close in your lives? What disappointments or regrets can you let go of? What dreams have you not yet fulfilled? What have you accomplished in your lives together? What challenges have you overcome? What sweet moments of joy have you shared together over the years?
• Where do you find yourselves in life today? What new challenges or obstacles are you facing? What limitations are you now experiencing, physically, financially or otherwise? What are you concerned about? What is the quality of your life together? What do you appreciate about each other and your relationship?
• What’s opening up in your lives? What do you long for? What new dreams are you having? What passions are bubbling up inside? What are you yearning for? What vision do you now have for your future? What do you want to accomplish? What contribution do you want to make to your families, to your community and to the world?

The empty nest phase of marriage is a time in your life when you can create a new purpose for yourselves, as individuals and for your marriage. What are you being called to do? Where do you want to focus your attention? What is most important to you now? What are your unique gifts as a couple? What are you building? What is the impact do you want your lives and your marriage to have on others?

Spend time with each other and have conversations to explore some of these questions together. Not only will you have more time to spend together but also the quality of that time will expand. Your empty nest will begin to fill with new dreams, new contribution and new purpose!

Posted in Partnership Marriage